The Value of Projection
How often have you noticed someone accusing others of doing what they themselves are doing unconsciously? What about the times you've caught yourself doing this?
Projection is that psychological phenomenon in which we notice and judge what other people are doing while not realizing we do the same.
Keep in mind not all judgements are negative. We judge some people as "beautiful" and others as "smart" or "lucky." Projection always seems to involve a comparison. They "are" what we "are not." They are doing what we are not doing.
We humans like to control which parts of us are allowed to be expressed. This begins with early childhood conditioning. We learn appropriate behaviors that please our parents, social group at school, and later we choose roles that also express those parts of ourselves. Meanwhile we keep the "unapproved" parts covered and hidden. Sometimes they are so hidden we don't even know they are there. But we tend to notice those parts in OTHER people, don't we? Projection is tricky because it is literally noticing in others and energy that is submerged within you.
Let the Movie Begin! Are you the projector or the Screen?
Other people play a vital role in showing us the parts of us we have denied and hidden. We might admire someone for their "honesty" because in our daily life we tell white lies to please others or keep ourselves safe from disapproval. But within us IS a purely honest part and we admire it when we see it displayed in someone around us.
We might be playing the nice guy role in our daily life because "nice" is our identity, but our private thoughts are not so nice. Then we find ourselves judging that behavior in others- their ability to be openly nasty. Again, projection.
Projections exist to help you BE all you can be. Beneath every projection is a POWER waiting to be fulfilled in you.
Projection give us insight into how we are self-limiting. The more we limit ourselves, the more judgmental we are toward people around us. But, if you accept and allow ALL parts of you to exist, they become tools in your toolkit for living a fuller life. When we compartmentalize who were are, those parts have to find expression in the people around us.
3 Ways to Change Negative Projections
1. Turn the judgement around by saying, "Everywhere I've BEEN that energy, or DONE that thing, I destroy and uncreate the judgement I hold against myself for that."
2. Look at how you do this TO YOURSELF
3. OWN it as a power you have, or the power to change.
Your "controlling" spouse requires you to constantly reassure them and please them by doing what they want. Meanwhile your freedom withers while your resentment deepens.
1.Release everywhere you've BEEN the controller or DONE the controlling behavior (perhaps in another situation that is entirely unrelated!)
2. Recognize how you are controlling of YOURSELF, in your thoughts or actions. Another person can never limit us unless we permit it.
3. OWN the power of AUTHORITY.
When others' behavior seems extreme it is only because sometimes we need extreme examples to guide us toward our freedom of choice!
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